I heard a funny thing recently. It was an old friend who’d emailed and asked how I was enjoying my time in Lucerne. He wrote ‘you certainly look happy on Facebook.’
Ha! Maybe he was being ironic because who doesn’t look happy on Facebook? I mean, no one’s posting about their two-day crying bender or the hours they’ve wasted online when they could’ve been, like, watching TV and stuff. Right? There are plenty of cute kids but rarely tantrums or sleepless nights. It would appear we are all happy.
Or even next level… with the number of coaches I have now befriended thanks to my course, it can certainly feel like everyone else is having this rocking life, sunning themselves by the pool with their lap top while the money pours in. This is one version of reality. It’s like a holiday snap shot – we don’t see the delayed flights, the cattle queuing, the Bali-belly or the feeling of being seen as a walking ATM machine. We only see mid-aftrenoon cocktails in the pool and sunny days.
That’s why I like to post the occasional photo of Lucerne’s glaring grey skies. It’s my way of keepin’ it real (dawg). But it’s a kind of taboo thing to do – post our unhappiness on social media – unless you mix in certain circles that do that type of thing.
In light of this, I bring you the news that apparently Facebook makes people depressed. Just begin typing ‘Facebook makes me’ into a search engine and see what options are suggested.
Who can relate?
Then, to top this off, M said I’m giving people the impression from my blog that I’m happy all the time.
I AM NOT ALWAYS HAPPY!
I totally fall off the wagon and give into fear-based thinking and feel not good enough and too flawed to post anything at times. But then I get back up, read or listen to something inspiring (as I’ve posted so many times before), get on with my work and get back to the version of reality of my choosing. It’s not important if we come off centre, what’s important is how quickly we get back to it.
I have pretty high standards when it comes to the way I feel. Don’t you?
So today, in honour of maintaining a miraculous mindset, I present you with My Top Five for High Vibes, which will have you high fiving the plants and singing down the street (or whatever your version of happiness is). Because sometimes we just need a little help from our friends.
1. Sensual Sipping
Where would we be as a race without tea and coffee? We’d probably still be trying to rub sticks together to make fire. Personally, coffee can kick me into the best mood. It has transformative powers. It makes me more creative, focused, motivated and joyful. And that’s why I believe in the transformative powers of coffee.
Coffee is often demonised, so it was with great pleasure that I inhaled this article about Turning Your Coffee Habit Into A Healthy Morning Ritual. Ahh sigh. Using our coffee ritual to practice gratitude is my kind of morning fun.
Our beloved brew can set us up for the day ahead, like meditation. I wanted to write that drinking coffee is a form of yoga but a web search revealed it was not so. Dammit! There are appears to be no link between coffee and yoga (under the search ‘what kind of yoga is drinking coffee?’). Let us not be swayed by this though, nor fear of coffee breath nor yellowing teeth, Coffee Time (or of course Tea Time) is our time for reflection. It’s the opportunity to take a break from our busy days and just be. It is also a reason to get up in the morning. Can I get an amen?
2. Happiness Playlist
Music can change a mood in an instant – but we forget to use it when we need it most.
So make yourself a collection of songs that can snap you back to a happy reality. I have twenty songs on repeat. I often play them on the bus to the hospital and I am certainly one of the happiest people in the radiotherapy waiting room. Life is just better with music. On a clear day I sing my way home through the quiet residential streets. I get a kick out of being crazy amongst strangers. It is part of my self-prescribed treatment.
First up for me is a song I still love, Blurred Lines. Seriously, try not to a) dance b) strut c) bop your head a little at least. It’s impossible!
I also love Rihanna’s & Calvin Harris’s We Found Love
It’s not exactly a ‘happy’ song but it makes me feel ALIVE and has that jumping round the living room like you’re down in the mud at a music festival kind of beat. Obviously, it’s way better though because you don’t get dirty.
Another song I kill daily is Rihanna’s Diamonds.
Shine bright like a diamond
Shine bright like a diamond
Fine light in the beautiful sea
I chose to be happy
Those five words – I chose to be happy – that’s everything right there.
It hits me hard every time.
Being emotional is just as fun as being happy.
It sounds like a mother’s cliché but isn’t it entirely true? Helping releases some crazy good endorphins. And this one actually is a form of yoga – karma yoga – or being in service of others.
My favourite form of helping is called ‘helping the tourists’. I have an affinity to the helpless group of lost wanderers. If you want directions, I’m your girl! I’ll scan the shelves for gluten-free products with you! Pick me! I’ll tell you the best place to buy your ‘gelatto’! I separated euros and francs for a Chinese man at the supermarket last week and came home buzzing. Helping others totally changes up our energy.
As Gabby Bernstein says,
When you’re feeling helpless, help someone.
It sounds like something the aliens made up but this is actually something real people are talking about. Earthing simply means walking barefoot, grounding your body to the earth, and is supposed to reduce inflammation as electrons are conducted from the earth to our bodies. Seriously, I’m not making this up. There are even experts in the field and whole books written on it.
But what I really wanted to say is that it’s so great to lie on the ground and just be. We went to Lugano a Saturday ago to see the sun (it sounds like a tourist attraction and it is) and our favourite part of the day was when we lay under a tree on the grass and didn’t speak, except to talk about when last we’d done this and how awesome it was. We relaxed into the arms of Mamma Earth. And it felt so good.
5. Just Feel It
Rather than stuff our feelings down or try to be inflatably happy, we can just ask,
‘What am I feeling?’
‘And given that I’m feeling that what do I want?’
Maybe you’ll find that you really want to have some fun… or do the work you’ve been avoiding… or deepen your friendships… or go to sleep… or become a better conversationalist… or be more interesting… or hold a one-man dance party… or sing at the top of your lungs in public… or clean your room… or hire a cleaner… or start your own business… or lie under a tree… OR forgive yourself a little more.
Because we all need a little help from our friends at times.
I hope you will let me know how you keep your vibe high in the comments below. What makes you sing?
And I’ll leave you with the words of Rihanna,
We chose to be happy
(like diamonds in the sky)